


Shy? Not really...

by deanisbiandsoami



Category: Supernatural
Genre: (a little unrealistic maybe), Alternate Universe - Human, Cas is making him happy, Comfort, Cute, Dean's a mechanic, Fluff, M/M, doesn't matter though, no hunters in here, past depressed Dean, past self harm
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-22
Updated: 2014-04-22
Packaged: 2018-01-20 09:29:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,261
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1505369
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/deanisbiandsoami/pseuds/deanisbiandsoami
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Everything seemed perfect. And it was... there was only one problem. Cas was horny.</p><p>A lot.</p><p>And Dean wouldn't even let him take off his shirt.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Shy? Not really...

**Beta'd by[my darling J](http://archiveofourown.org/users/HufflepuffsAngel/pseuds/HufflepuffsAngel)**

* * *

 

Castiel had been in love with this boy ever since he moved to Lawrence. And luckily enough Dean Winchester felt just the same. It was almost a miracle. They managed to ignore the stupid kids at school that were cat-calling and harassing them. After some time they got tired of their bullying and let them be.

 

Everything seemed perfect. And it was... there was only one problem. Cas was horny.

A lot.

And Dean wouldn't even let him take off his shirt. He caught Cas's hands every time when they started unbuttoning it.

"Cas, please." Dean mumbled, his hands around Cas's, resting on his chest. Castiel was above him, straddling his hips. Dean could feel the erection in his lover's pants.

"Stop…" Dean whispered. Cas sighed and dropped his head on Dean's shoulder.

"Dean, we've been together for almost two years. I love you, please." Cas begged. Dean kissed his hair.

"I'm just not ready for this… I'm sorry, Cas. I love you too, just please understand that." Dean said.

 

And Castiel tried to, he really did. He accepted that Dean wasn't ready and he waited. A long time. A really long time but at some point he wouldn't wait any longer.

He reached that point two years later.

"Dean." Cas said when he was stopped by Dean again. He was straddling Dean's lap on the couch once more. Dean looked up at him, Cas could see the fear in his lover's eyes.

"Cas, please…" He started.

"No, it's enough, Dean. I've been waiting for more than four years now, I love you, Dean. I love you more than anything but I need this." Cas said. "I'm not forcing you to do anything… I'm just saying that I will not wait any longer." Dean closed his eyes and took a deep breath. He moved Cas's hands from his chest to rest at either side of his hips. Then he moved his own hands to unbutton his shirt.

"I've been wanting this just as much as you, Cas… I just never knew how to tell you. I was… scared." Dean said as he slowly pulled his shirt off. He rested his wrists on Cas's thighs, palms upturned, exposing  thin scars going up to his elbow on both forearms.

"There are more on my thighs." Dean whispered. He avoided Cas's eyes until Cas lifted one of his arms, kissing every single scar and then taking the other arm and doing the same.

"Why, Dean?" Cas asks, meeting Dean's gaze, his hands still holding his arm. Dean pulls it out of Cas's grip and takes his hands instead, turning his arms to hide the scars again.

"My mother died… a few years before you came to Lawrence." Dean said quietly. "My life just crumbled.  My straight-A student brother got into some bad stuff, did drugs and ran off with some chick called Ruby, my father became an alcoholic and I… well I had lost everything. I didn't know how to escape the constant stupid emptiness… this seemed like a good idea." He lifts one hand to cup Cas's cheek.

 "And then you marched into my life and you made me love you. As if by magic, you fixed me. You pulled me out of that hell and put me back together without ever noticing it. I loved you for that and now I love you for your kindness and your unbelievable compassion, your intelligence and your incredible beauty." Dean looks down to their joined hands, eyes dragging over the scars on his raised arm.

"I beg you, Castiel, forgive me for this." Maybe Dean wanted to say more but at that moment Cas just surged forward and pressed their lips together, burying his hands in Dean's hair.

When they break apart for air he whispers "There is nothing to forgive you for. You stopped, didn't you? As long as you hurt no more beautiful skin of yours, I'm not the one to judge you."

They had the most beautiful sex that night, Castiel taking Dean apart slowly, kissing every single dip and curve of his body, every scar on his thighs and every freckle he could find. He did everything to show Dean that he wasn't alone in this cruel world, to show him that his life was not empty and that he was loved regardless of how many scars there were on his body.

"Thank you, Cas." Dean mumbled, his face buried in Cas's chest. Cas put his arms around Dean, pulling him closer and before he can reply; Dean is asleep, breathing steadily against his skin.

 

In the following months Dean slowly gets used to Cas seeing his scars, he starts wearing t-shirts when it becomes hotter and he stops sleeping in long-sleeved shirts… that is if they actually go to sleep straight away. Castiel is happy to see how Dean is starting to cope by accepting his past.

The first time Dean wore a t-shirt outside their apartment is a year after he told Cas, because a heat-wave hit Kansas and there was no way he would getting away with wearing long sleeves in the garage today.

"Cas… I don't think I can-" Castiel cuts him off with a kiss.

"You can do this." He says, cupping Dean's face and pressing their foreheads together. "You're strong and it's in your past. You can't wear long sleeves forever." Dean takes a deep breath and nods.

"You're right…" He admits and then kisses Cas again before leaving.

 

He gets weird looks at first when they see him in just a t-shirt… he has been working with Bobby and Benny for around two years now… when he comes closer their expressions turn to shock. He keeps his eyes down gets to work fast.

 

They corner him when he wants to leave.

"What the hell, man?" Benny asks incredulously. Bobby just looks concerned.

"I don't do it anymore. Last cut was five years ago." Dean explains stiffly. Benny nods.

"I don't want you to hurt yourself ever again. And when you think you need to, you call me. You hear me, boy?" Bobby says kindly. Dean smiles.

"Thank you." He replies. Bobby smiles at him and Benny puts his hand on his shoulder.

 

Dean hasn't been this happy since before his mother died. He feels good. So he decides to do something to show it. He wants it to be a surprise though, so he waits until Cas is away for the weekend. As soon as Cas is gone he drives to the nearest tattoo parlour.

Cas almost freaks out completely when he comes home to Dean with a bandaged arm.

"It’s okay, Cas calm down." He soothes, putting his hands on Cas's arms.

"How am I supposed to- you fucking PROMISED ME!" Cas shouts in anger.

"Cas, I didn't cut." Dean reassures him.

 "Let me explain." He adds calmly, looking at Cas who takes a deep breath and nods. Dean smiles and starts unwrapping the bandage. Cas gasps when he sees the tattoo. The writing is still kind of red around the edges but it’s more legible than it was two days ago.

It's a small black phrase across the scars on Dean's right arm. 'Not anymore * 09-18-2008'.

"Dean…" Cas says softly. "That's the day-"

"-we met, yeah, I know. It's also the first day I didn't cut." Dean says. Cas pulls him closer, crushing their lips together.

"I love you" Cas mumbles into the kiss. Dean smiles against his lips.

"I love you too, idiot." Dean mumbles back.


End file.
